I love talking to kids, my own and others. It's so fun to hear things from their perspective... the words they choose, the gestures that are new and fresh and whole-hearted.
Here are some of my favorite moments from chats with G recently.
Where is the summer? Where is summer, Mama? Oh, behind the clouds is the summerness.
I see them! I see telephone lions and power lions. Both lions!
L meanwhile, takes each and every opportunity to remind us of one thing.
me: L, are you hungry?
L: No, I'm a GIRL.
me: L, you are a silly thing.
L: No, Mama. I'm a GIRL.
L: Meooooow.
her daddy: L, are you pretending to be a cat?
L: No, I'm not a cat. I'm a GIRL!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
a happy Mama's day
I had a wonderful day yesterday. I got to indulge in relaxed hours with my favorite people, feel warm spring sunshine, proclaim in admiration about a card that G actually made for me himself and signed his name, give my own mama a big hug and a gift that made her smile. It was a beautiful day and the best part about it was sharing it.
We called it Mama's day because it's easiest to talk to our four and two year olds about in the words we use. And I'm Mama to them, not Mother. Sometimes I'm Mom now too, especially when G is showing off his newest skills.
I hope you enjoyed mother's day too, whether you are a mom or no. It's all about love and that's worth celebrating and reveling in.
We called it Mama's day because it's easiest to talk to our four and two year olds about in the words we use. And I'm Mama to them, not Mother. Sometimes I'm Mom now too, especially when G is showing off his newest skills.
I hope you enjoyed mother's day too, whether you are a mom or no. It's all about love and that's worth celebrating and reveling in.
Friday, April 23, 2010
perplexasaur
Lately G has said That's like me several times while looking at pictures of Tyrannosaurus Rex.
The first time I was startled and asked him about it and he repeated it. I thought it was a little odd, but then L has been saying things that are strange and non traditional all the time so I figured it was a one time mystery.
Until it happened again. We were looking at a book where a T Rex is chasing other dinosaurs with a nasty grimace on his snout and G said happily That's like me; that's like G. I asked You're like a T Rex?
Yes!
Hmmm. I am now officially in mystery solving mode. I can come up with a handful of different ideas but I don't know if I'll ever have my curiosity and worry satisfied on this one.
Does this have to do with the anger expression and control issues he's working through?
Is is merely his favorite dinosaur?
Maybe he's scared of the T Rex and is associating himself with it to master his fear?
Maybe he's attracted to it's power and strength?
Does he see himself as what I would call a monster? (Oh please, $@#%ing tell me it's not this.)
(Now grasping at tiny straws...) Maybe he's confusing uses of the word like (I like that. vs. I am like that.)?
Regardless of what it means or how this makes sense in his head, it's a positive association for him and so I'm marking it down as a good thing. And I really hope that some day he can explain it to me. You know, so I don't worry anymore and because I bet it's an entertaining story.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
a schedule
this would be a very good day, according to G (4 yrs):
wake up
eat candies
play (computer) games
play with L
play with the dog
eat candies
We have been playing a new game lately I'm calling What Next? G asks What next? and waits until I or his Daddy answer, then immediately repeats What next? We run through actually planned activities as well as theoretical possibilities (and sometimes impossibilities) for the next hours, days weeks, years, etc. until G's Daddy and I can't take any more and heroically attempt to change the subject. Tonight when I got into several weeks in the future and said I was done, G came up with his own ideas about the next day.
wake up
eat candies
play (computer) games
play with L
play with the dog
eat candies
We have been playing a new game lately I'm calling What Next? G asks What next? and waits until I or his Daddy answer, then immediately repeats What next? We run through actually planned activities as well as theoretical possibilities (and sometimes impossibilities) for the next hours, days weeks, years, etc. until G's Daddy and I can't take any more and heroically attempt to change the subject. Tonight when I got into several weeks in the future and said I was done, G came up with his own ideas about the next day.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
fluid language
A 3 year old boy we are friends with and my 2 year old girl both did similar things I found interesting last week. He pointed at a baseball cap with a GAP logo that he was wearing and said, Know what it says? Jason. (Jason is his blogname.)
She pointed at her carseat which is inscribed with Eddie Bauer and said That's L... (her name.)
Neither of them can read yet but obviously both can recognize writing/lettering and know it represents meaningful words. It made me wonder. Do they realize that writing is static or do they think that it changes depending on the situation or person it's associated with? Do they think that the reader assigns meaning to the letters, making up a phrase based on the situation? Do they think the same way about writing and letters or is it different for each one?
I've always been fascinated by the idea that language is not one hundred percent accurate. There is some fluidity, some space for meaning and gesture and nuance that we assign individually and where it can only overlap so much with another's personal language experience. We never know what someone else is thinking exactly, maybe just mostly, or at other times not much at all. Certainly for my son with language issues this is even more true and makes it all the more astounding how close we are able to be to others even when we have muddy and vague understandings of each other's inner worlds.
I know the magic of putting the pieces together and learning how letters, words and reading work will come for my daughter and our friend Jason. I wonder what the magic of knowing that letters can have meaning but not knowing the rules is like. And I wonder about the experience of people who are nonverbal. And not so infrequently I wonder about the few children who were actually raised by wolves after being lost/abandoned by humans. How is that world?
How is your world?
She pointed at her carseat which is inscribed with Eddie Bauer and said That's L... (her name.)
Neither of them can read yet but obviously both can recognize writing/lettering and know it represents meaningful words. It made me wonder. Do they realize that writing is static or do they think that it changes depending on the situation or person it's associated with? Do they think that the reader assigns meaning to the letters, making up a phrase based on the situation? Do they think the same way about writing and letters or is it different for each one?
I've always been fascinated by the idea that language is not one hundred percent accurate. There is some fluidity, some space for meaning and gesture and nuance that we assign individually and where it can only overlap so much with another's personal language experience. We never know what someone else is thinking exactly, maybe just mostly, or at other times not much at all. Certainly for my son with language issues this is even more true and makes it all the more astounding how close we are able to be to others even when we have muddy and vague understandings of each other's inner worlds.
I know the magic of putting the pieces together and learning how letters, words and reading work will come for my daughter and our friend Jason. I wonder what the magic of knowing that letters can have meaning but not knowing the rules is like. And I wonder about the experience of people who are nonverbal. And not so infrequently I wonder about the few children who were actually raised by wolves after being lost/abandoned by humans. How is that world?
How is your world?
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
a very silly sort of girl
Two and a half is apparently a great age for amusing statements. Here are a few recent gems from L:
(Patting her own head) This is a big one!
I am so pooping! (Similar to I am so happy but this is a very angry statement, accented by loud screaming voice.)
I need lots of fingers! (Wiggling fingers around in front of her with an upset whining intonation.)
L: I want a yes.
me: A yes? What is a yes?
L: It's a yes for L!
I love listening to the big thoughts that come out of her tiny little mouth.
(Patting her own head) This is a big one!
I am so pooping! (Similar to I am so happy but this is a very angry statement, accented by loud screaming voice.)
I need lots of fingers! (Wiggling fingers around in front of her with an upset whining intonation.)
L: I want a yes.
me: A yes? What is a yes?
L: It's a yes for L!
I love listening to the big thoughts that come out of her tiny little mouth.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
I recently learned
1. Neutral ground for playdates is a really really good idea (and kids personal bedrooms are a bad space for learning how to share.)
2. You can find lots of clothes for 3 year old girls at thrift/consignment stores easily, but 5 year old boy clothing in good condition is a rare treasure.
3. L and I have very similar taste in clothing. She went through the shopping bag when we arrived home and picked out the two items I liked best and then demanded to try them on.
4. Even if it is the first day of sun and temps over fifty in months I will still get badly sunburnt in two hours (but my kids won't.)
5. Navigating the muddy waters of independence, cooperation and grace when things aren't the way you'd like is hard at 4 and still almost as hard at 30.
6. Computer game play is the only thing that will motivate G enough to actually poop on the toilet. Candy, toys, stickers, charts, praise, pleading and stories are not it.
7. It bothers me to hear someone use the word mainstream as a verb and specifically when it is their biggest goal for my child's educational future.
8. Food, games and activities are all much more appealing to 2 and 4 year olds when offered by peers and siblings than pesky adults.
9. The dog will actually eat a cigarette butt if we try to make him spit it out. Ugh!
10. G has developed an interest in the notion of a secret formula. (Where does he get this stuff?!) He named one of his animal creations Secret Formula and made sure his dad typed it out right for him.
2. You can find lots of clothes for 3 year old girls at thrift/consignment stores easily, but 5 year old boy clothing in good condition is a rare treasure.
3. L and I have very similar taste in clothing. She went through the shopping bag when we arrived home and picked out the two items I liked best and then demanded to try them on.
4. Even if it is the first day of sun and temps over fifty in months I will still get badly sunburnt in two hours (but my kids won't.)
5. Navigating the muddy waters of independence, cooperation and grace when things aren't the way you'd like is hard at 4 and still almost as hard at 30.
6. Computer game play is the only thing that will motivate G enough to actually poop on the toilet. Candy, toys, stickers, charts, praise, pleading and stories are not it.
7. It bothers me to hear someone use the word mainstream as a verb and specifically when it is their biggest goal for my child's educational future.
8. Food, games and activities are all much more appealing to 2 and 4 year olds when offered by peers and siblings than pesky adults.
9. The dog will actually eat a cigarette butt if we try to make him spit it out. Ugh!
10. G has developed an interest in the notion of a secret formula. (Where does he get this stuff?!) He named one of his animal creations Secret Formula and made sure his dad typed it out right for him.
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